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I’m sure this gets asked all the time. I now have a newborn. Will I ever be able to play video games again?
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May 24, 2024 13:02
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| # ? May 25, 2024 11:07 |
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Heithinn Grasida posted:I’m sure this gets asked all the time. I now have a newborn. Will I ever be able to play video games again? Our kid is 16ish months now and I can play some periodically (once every couple weeks?). The main issue is I can’t play complicated games or learn games. I forget how they work / story between plays. So yes, but maybe not in a way you want/like
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May 24, 2024 13:12
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I can split out some time occasionally but I’ve found my desire to play games is pretty low post baby.
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May 24, 2024 13:14
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I played Hades with 1 and 1/2 hands while bottle feeding a newborn in my lap. My own personal achievement. He’s now 3 and 1/2, and yells at my wife while she’s playing Tears of the Kingdom to make more trains.
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May 24, 2024 13:36
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First one born in November 2021: Finished Neon White and Tunic during naps, Vampire Survivors during feedings, lots of Hearthstone. Over time you’ll get your hobby time back, but you definitely have to be more intentional about it. Me and a bunch of other dads have a standing Tuesday evening for Helldivers or other multiplayer games we want to mess around with. But can’t do MMOs anymore (and I probably wouldn’t want to anyway) and Mobas are a tougher ask because you might need to drop at any moment.
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May 24, 2024 13:41
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I have an arrangement with my husband so I can continue to feed my WoW addiction - I watch our son for three evenings a week so he can go to the gym, then I get two video game nights with friends. When my son was a newborn I took like a 6 month break from gaming though.
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May 24, 2024 14:33
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Helps if you like strategy games where you control everything with the mouse and thus only need one hand. I don't really remember this but according to my wife I used to sometimes play these when our kids were babies while holding them.
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May 24, 2024 15:42
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I remember clicking away at Civilization while a baby slept on me for hours Good times
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May 24, 2024 15:48
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I moved from PC to PS4 when I had a newborn. Easy to set down the controller if needed and can get comfortable with her sleeping on my chest while paying. Years 1-2 were more active though, so didn't get anything except an occasional nap hour. Now I can play rogue likes on my steam deck fairly often while the toddler does her own thing
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May 24, 2024 15:54
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Heithinn Grasida posted:I’m sure this gets asked all the time. I now have a newborn. Will I ever be able to play video games again? sit indian style and let the baby lay down in your lap. ez pz.
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May 24, 2024 16:23
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Bedtime is at 7, video game time is at 8
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May 24, 2024 16:34
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Bedtime is like 9:15 and I just wanna go to sleep after 
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May 24, 2024 16:56
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Yeah the wfh-pandemic turn + infant kinda destroyed my video game lifestyle. I’ve kept it on life support with sporadic binging on switch games though
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May 24, 2024 17:07
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Heithinn Grasida posted:I’m sure this gets asked all the time. I now have a newborn. Will I ever be able to play video games again? As a father of a 8 month old: certainly more than I expected. First months I ended up playing some games while the baby was sleeping in a frontal baby sling/wrap carrier. Because that was the best way to ensure he was sleeping as long as possible in the evening before waking up the mother + skin-to-skin contact this was quite some hours. Now the baby goes to sleep quite early (6h30 pm) and so I end up still having some free time in the evening. Obiviously less than before due to the extra chores, but it's not that bad.
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May 24, 2024 17:32
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Heithinn Grasida posted:I’m sure this gets asked all the time. I now have a newborn. Will I ever be able to play video games again? Very quietly.
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May 24, 2024 17:52
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Heithinn Grasida posted:I’m sure this gets asked all the time. I now have a newborn. Will I ever be able to play video games again?
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May 24, 2024 17:56
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Heithinn Grasida posted:I’m sure this gets asked all the time. I now have a newborn. Will I ever be able to play video games again? It does, and we have an entire thread to cover it! https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=4031577 The answer is, I've discovered, the squishy game style of "roguelikes" and yes Hades is one of them. Slay the Spire is another. Basically you have a game you can beat in 35-75 minutes, but there's meta progression so each time you beat it, you unlock something new. I've been playing Dave the Diver which just got a Godzilla DLC https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3563643 And finally, since my kid is old enough to watch cartoons now (monopolizing the living room TV), I went ahead and got a $140 third party retro handheld emulator (RG353V looks just like an OG Gameboy, but can play anything from Gameboy up to N64 and Sega Dreamcast) https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3937810 I'm currently working my way through Super Mario Land and Advance Wars Hadlock fucked around with this message at 18:19 on May 24, 2024 |
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May 24, 2024 17:59
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Into the breach is a wonderful game with a newborn. I’m so loving bad at it my play sessions are mostly just staring at the screen trying to work out the solution. Baba is you is another one like this.
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May 24, 2024 19:41
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I’m far too stupid post child having to advance any further in Baba is You but that game ruled. I sneak in video games when I can, it gets easier when they’re older and more self directed. The toddler wants to play a lot of Mario Kart with me now, and went through a phase of wanting to watch me play Spider Man. Toddler refused to go to sleep with mom, then she had to go deal with a clogged milk duct so me and baby tagged in for toddler bed time at 10:00PM. Then he still wouldn’t sleep so we tagged back out and baby and I went to bed at 11, then he woke me up at 1 to eat, then the toddler woke me up at 3, then I couldn’t get the toddler to go back to sleep, I fell asleep in the toddler bed until 4:30, then I finally brought him to my bed at 5:30. Baby woke me up at 7:30 to eat again. Toddler vanished somewhere between 6 and 7 to go play on his iPad on his own which we didn’t realize he knew how to do so now he is already Screen Poisoned and will be one of those dreaded “An iPad Kid”. This sucks space uncle fucked around with this message at 20:02 on May 24, 2024 |
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May 24, 2024 19:57
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I’m feeling very guilty because my husband has been super sad lately that we can’t (meaning, I won’t) have another baby. Obviously I want to make my husband happy, but in my mind we are extremely fortunate to have one wonderful kid and having another is simply not affordable or even really possible with my age/health issues left over from the first one. I wish I could help him feel less sad.
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May 24, 2024 20:06
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remigious posted:I’m feeling very guilty because my husband has been super sad lately that we can’t (meaning, I won’t) have another baby. Obviously I want to make my husband happy, but in my mind we are extremely fortunate to have one wonderful kid and having another is simply not affordable or even really possible with my age/health issues left over from the first one. Have you shown him how the numbers don't add up? What is his understanding of your health and age issues? (As in, what does he say when you bring them up re: having more kids) I'm trying not to judge him too hard but to be very blunt my instinct with men like this is to tell them if they want to feel less bummed out then they can try carrying the next baby themselves, or to show me the money we'll need for IVF surrogate/adoption. It makes sense to feel sad about this sort of thing, and it also makes sense to talk to a therapist about it rather than (inadvertently or not) putting guilt on the childbearing parent.
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May 24, 2024 20:28
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He's allowed to feel sad. Is he actually putting on guilt, or are you just feeling guilty because he's sad?
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May 24, 2024 20:31
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Maybe do a session of family therapy if you can. Not because there’s anything wrong with your relationship or your reactions (this is a big thing to have big feelings about). But a professional may be able to ask the right questions and get you two to talk it all out and get on the same page.
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May 24, 2024 20:37
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I think you are all right - some therapy may be in order. He’s not making me feel guilty intentionally, but he’ll make a comment sometimes like “I guess some women don’t mind being pregnant” which kind of does make me think this is my fault. Plus he had a vasectomy! It’s just not going to happen! So if we both need some outside help to come to terms with that it’s worth looking into.
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May 24, 2024 21:16
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remigious posted:I think you are all right - some therapy may be in order. He’s not making me feel guilty intentionally, but he’ll make a comment sometimes like “I guess some women don’t mind being pregnant” which kind of does make me think this is my fault. Plus he had a vasectomy! It’s just not going to happen! So if we both need some outside help to come to terms with that it’s worth looking into. Yeah he can feel sad and have his own feelings, definitely, but he also shouldn't be directing passive aggressive snipes like that at you.
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May 24, 2024 21:24
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There are also a zillion ways to bring more children into your life that don’t involve full-bore baby time. Fostering, volunteering, or even offering to babysit for free to other families you know are some ways to have additional kids in your life. I just scheduled our snip after we did many months of back and forth around whether we want two or not. I want more kids in my life than just the one but I’m not sad at all because I know we have a lot of pathways to make that happen and the biological way had never been my first choice. I’m happy to have that off the table. Totally fair that he feels sad about his preferred avenue for getting the family he wants being closed off - but it’s not your fault and there are other ways if the two of you someday want to go there.
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May 24, 2024 23:05
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Foster to adopt isn’t the shortcut to growing your family that often gets mentioned to couples struggling with fertility issues. Parenting a kid who’s lived through trauma has some overlap with general parenting, but there’s a lot that’s different. It’s not something to be entered into lightly, particularly if you already have a child in your existing family structure.
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May 25, 2024 00:54
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Heithinn Grasida posted:I’m sure this gets asked all the time. I now have a newborn. Will I ever be able to play video games again? I bought a Steam Deck a few months before my daughter was born and it was basically a Stardew Valley + emulation machine for the first few months she was here.
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May 25, 2024 01:12
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Engineer Lenk posted:Foster to adopt isn’t the shortcut to growing your family that often gets mentioned to couples struggling with fertility issues. I need to echo this. It's wonderfully fulfilling, but also full of uncertainty, trauma, behaviors and worry. If you do go down this route, depending on your state and county there are also a lot of resources available to help with some of that.
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May 25, 2024 03:50
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I wasn't even thinking foster-to-adopt, just foster. But yes, adoption is it's own completely separate path that's not in any way simple.
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May 25, 2024 04:51
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